Changes… exciting, scary, nail-biting, terrifying, thrilling. Doesn’t matter if the change is large or small, personal or professional. Some people welcome it with open arms and some run for the hills. Whether you like it or not, it’s necessary. Not allowing yourself to grow and change is a huge mistake. One that will lead to regrets and disappointment in the long run. Depending on the change will determine how you should approach the solution. Changing a behavior is going to be a different process than changing your hair or fashion style. This writing is going to focus on my thoughts about changing a behavior.
Changes can lead to fresh starts and that is a blessing in its self. Sometimes it’s so intimidating that it’s hard to know where to start. I’ve thought about this long and hard and I think it all comes down to breaking it down into small steps.
Define what you want/need to change. Make a list, outline your objective and how you plan to achieve it. Commit to this change, give yourself detailed steps to help you along. Be specific on your goals. Don’t make your list too long, break it down to one change at a time.
Let go of what’s not working for you. Whether it’s the past, perceived wrongs against you or actions that you did without thought. Figure out what is causing your issues and do what is necessary to move past it to a happier present and future. It will be hard but worth it.
Talk to someone who you trust to be objective to get another opinion. We sometimes can’t see how our behaviors affect other people because we are so focused on ourselves. Kinda like not seeing the forest for the trees kind of thing. Listen with an open mind without getting your defenses up in full charge. It can be hard to hear criticisms without having the need to respond but if you truly trust this person to be honest, then you owe it to yourself to really listen.
Make a committment to see it through to the end. Don’t give up because it’s hard or you’re feeling lazy. Give yourself little rewards when you have reached milestones that you’ve set. Each time you can cross a step off your list, pat yourself on the back, tap dance on a table, you deserve it!
Made a slip in your commitment to change? It’s ok, you’re human, not perfect. No one is and you need to remember that. Don’t beat yourself up too much. Slips are going to happen. Just resolve to stay strong and know that you will reach your goal. Take it one day at a time, minute by minute if need be. Do your best and move on to the next day. Bad habits weren’t developed overnight and they won’t be broken in a day.
Help yourself out by leaving reminders around the house. Read your list often. Put a Post-It note on the bathroom mirror, take a three-minute break at work and mentally give yourself a pep talk. Reach out to family and friends for support.
Stay positive. Throw negativity out the window. Negativity will bring change to an abrupt halt. Start thinking that you can’t do it and you will most likely not be able to.
Please remember that everyday is the opportunity for a fresh start. Never forget that you have the ability to grow and change to be the best that you can be. You deserve to be happy and you owe it to yourself to be.
So get off your lazy butt, figure out what’s making you stagnant and get to moving. Make an effort to grow and be happier. Life is mostly a continuing series of changes, the challenge is to keep up with them and to go with the flow. Know when to accept the change and what battles you need to fight. I know that I have room to grow and I’m determined to be the happiest I can be. Want to join me in the journey to change? I’ll be your shoulder if you’ll be mine.
I believe in you…