Friday’s Freak Outs

New thing I’m starting here, short little posts everyday of the week in addition to the “Song of the morning” and my other random ramblings. This is what’s in store…

Monday’s Mad Moments

Tuesday’s Tirades

Wednesday’s Wisdom

Thursday’s Thoughts

Friday’s Freak Outs

And this being Friday and I’m definitely freaked out right now, you get to read about it. Today is a dreary, rainy day that’s contributing to my “freaked out” mood. I didn’t have a direction in mind when I started writing this blog. I just knew that I needed an outlet, a place where I could be heard. I’ve skimmed over most of my feelings, given glimpses here and there of the “real” me. I didn’t and still don’t want to completely bare my soul, not willing to stand naked in front of the world. With that being said, I’m going to open the door just a bit.

Everyone has fears, some little and some that can cripple you. I have bigs one but none that keep me from living. And that right there is one of them. The fear of not living my life as joyously as possible.

1. I have an intense fear of snakes, I even shutter typing the word. And I seem to be a snake magnet. If there’s one around, it will find me.

2. I tend to wake up in the middle of the night, freaking out because I’m alone, bad dream or a multitude of other reasons. Take your pick, I’ve freaked out about a lot of things. I think this will get better in time once I adjust to being completely on my own.

3. I freak out about being able to trust again. Will I be able to? I’ve always been a pretty trusting person and I’ve lost that.

4. I have a fear of having a heart attack and dying alone.

And I think that’s enough freak outs. I’m starting to depress myself and I’ve had enough of that crap! I may have to re-think the Friday post. How about Friday’s Fantasies. Now that’s a subject I can really warm up to!!! Heck of a lot more fun than freak outs! So stay tuned and see if we can have some fun with Friday’s Fantasies! Why don’t you leave me a comment and give me some ideas about what you’d like to hear.

And one more thing, I’m posting this weekend from my iPhone so I’m not sure how it’s going to turn out. That and I’m entertaining some of the g-kids all weekend. Let me know if what you see is a disaster and I’ll let you know if I survive the weekend! Deal?

Until tomorrow, be thinking of those fantasies!

Steffanie

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