Ever had one of those days when it feels like it’s you against the entire world? That no matter what you do, it’s doesn’t make a difference? That’s my day… Each time I feel like I’ve hit rock bottom, I find out, nope, Steff old girl, you really haven’t.
I’ve preached here on my blog, over and over about staying positive, that you are in charge of your own destiny, that you are responsible for your thoughts and actions. I believe in it, meant every word I said. But like you… I have moments where I lose sight of that. One of the best things about me is that once I make the decision to “pull up my big girl panties and deal with it”, I usually can. And I’m going to do it now.
I’ve always had a charmed life. My family and home have always been my priority, I worked hard to achieve my goals, I took care of my responsibilities, I did everything right. At this minute, things aren’t so great with me, both personally and professionally and I feel like I’m going to collapse under the stress of it all. So while sitting in my office this morning, I found myself asking… can it get any worse? And the answer is, it damn sure can. Compared to millions of others, I have it all despite feeling like I don’t. I made a list of ways that it could be worse and it was more frightening than I could imagine.
I’m able to breathe on my own without assistance from a machine. I’m able to walk into the kitchen for a glass of water on my own two legs. I’m able to see the photos of my loved ones on the wall. I’m able to hear the soft music I have playing. I have a big comfy bed to crawl into every night. I have water to bathe in every day. I have food to eat. The list goes on and on. I have so much to be thankful and grateful for that in the face of all that is good, I’m ashamed of my doubts.
So no matter how bad I think it is, it can always be worse. It’s ok to have the moments of doubt and depression over the way things are because I am human, with all the imperfections you can imagine, but I know it’s in my power to change. I’ve been working hard to change things I’m unhappy with and I’ll continue to do so. I know that faith and perseverance will bring about these changes. It’s just a matter of staying strong and positive that I need to work on at times. I’m so appreciative that the times of doubt are far and few in between.
2011 is coming to an end… and I for one am ready for a new year. One that is going to see me at my best. Stick around just to see me shine!
Much love to you…