Failure is not an option

Repeat after me…  Failure is not an option.   And again, FAILURE IS NOT AN OPTION!

Pretty corny I know, but it’s something that we all can struggle with.  No one likes to fail and sometimes its our own fault that we do.  Have you ever wanted to do something but stopped before you even started?  Thoughts of failure telling you that you couldn’t do it.  All the while being disappointed with yourself for not taking that first step, knowing deep inside that you’re your own worst enemy.  You finally admit to yourself that your self-esteem has reached an all time low.

It happens to us all at one time or another and at varying degrees.  It might be a momentary thing that you can shake off quickly or one that can take a lot of work to overcome.  Whatever the case may be, consider making these tips a daily practice and I promise, really promise that your self-confidence will flourish.

  • Smile – First thing in the morning, before your feet hit the floor.  Do this every day and soon it will be automatic and sincere.  It creates an energy that will carry you through the day.
  • Clean up – Take a shower, wash your hair, brush your teeth.  Every single day.  The simple act of being clean will give you an instant boost.  It’s easy to let hygiene slip when you don’t feel good about yourself but it one of the most important and easy way to turn it around.
  • Dress up – Take a look in the mirror before you step outside.  Are you dressed for the occasion or are you slobbed out and don’t care?  Looking your best and knowing it will promptly put a smile on your face.
  • Stand tall – Suck that tummy in and throw those shoulders back.  Jut that chin out and strut.  How you carry yourself shows your level of confidence to the world.  You might be faking it at first but after a bit of standing tall, you WILL start feeling it.
  • Look in the mirror – Get your hair cut.  Splurge on a mani/pedi.  Buy some new clothes.  Take 20 seconds to brush the dog hair off your jacket.  Update your look.  Pay attention to the details.
  • Acceptance – Focus on your favorite physical features, not what you perceive to be your flaws.  You might be surprised to know that your flaws might be someone else’s favorite thing about you.  Change it if you can but learn to love and accept what you see.
  • Get organized – Immediately.  Clean up your space.  Put stuff that belongs together, together.  Use it then put it away.  Do this in your personal and work spaces and you’ll be amazed at how good it feels to know where everything is.  Sloppiness is a huge sign of “I don’t care about anything”.
  • Core values – Do you know what they are?  Define them and write them down.  Develop a personal mission statement with principles that you want to live by.
  • Start small – Once you decide to do something and you stop because it’s all too overwhelming, take a baby step.  Once you realize that you were successful with one step, the next one will be easier.  And then when you look back and see what you accomplished, you might possibly wonder what was so scary about starting in the first place.
  • Pep rally – Nothing beats a good old conversation in your head.  Stop with the negative commentary and start telling yourself that you own it, you’re going to kick butt at it and soon enough… you will.
  • Learn – Further your education.  Finish your degree, take a class in something that appeals to you.  Or make it a point to learn one new thing a day.  Even one random thing will be something you didn’t know the day before.
  • Change your clock – Get enough sleep.  Be on time.  Slow down.  Speed up.  Really take a look at your time and invest it wisely.
  • Habits – Take a good long, hard and honest look at your habits.  Are you being self-destructive?  Do you annoy yourself and others with repeated behavior that is in your power to change?  Stop wishing you would change and get off your butt and do it.
  • Be nice – Give of yourself.  Give 100%.  Volunteer.  Be generous with your time.  When you see that others appreciate your efforts, you will be on the path to appreciating yourself.
  • Know your stuff – Doesn’t matter if it’s a school test or a presentation to the Board of Directors, be prepared for it.  Don’t procrastinate.  Follow through with the commitment you made and the feeling of a job well done will exceed your fear of failing.
  • The Blues – Is it possible that your low self-confidence is a result of depression?  If you’re brutally honest with yourself and it might be a possibility, pick up the phone right now and call your doctor.  You don’t have to live that way when help is available.
  • Move – Meet up with your friends, make a new friend, join a gym or a book club.  The more you isolate yourself, the harder it is to get back out there.
  • Write – Start a gratitude journal.  Note three things each day that you are grateful for or something that you accomplished that made you feel proud.  When you are full of self-doubt, go back and read all the good things and be amazed at how quickly your attitude will turn around.
  • Believe – Besides finding and/or defining your spiritual beliefs, make the effort to believe in yourself.  I know, easier said than done but tell yourself every day that you are worth believing in.
  • Direction – Where do you want to go?  Doesn’t really matter if it’s moving across the country or making a change in your career.  Define your goals,  prepare for it and go for it.
  • Burn – Gather all your senses and find your passion, the thing that sets you on fire.   Stop and think about how you feel when you’re doing something you’re passionate about.  I’m going out on a limb to say that you felt pretty confident when you would do something you love.  You probably also felt more alive; energized and strong.  Explore how you can incorporate that passion into your life everyday.

Building your self-esteem is hard, especially if it’s a life long issue.  Changing yourself is a commitment and one that has to be worked at on a daily basis.  Even an hour by hour basis.  It might not be easy and it definitely won’t happen overnight BUT it can be done by making the commitment to yourself and sticking with it.  Use one or all of the tips above and make them a habit.  I promise it won’t be long until you and the world knows exactly how awesome you are.

I’m going to leave you with this video of Jessica.  I hope Jessica never loses her joy of life and confidence she shows when she said “I can do anything good, better than anyone else!”.  I think we all need this reminder.

Much love,



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